One of my readers posted this on my blog for me:
I’m sure you’ve heard this one before but basically I’m a 23 year old African guy, raised in the villages by my loving old lady and moved to the city to come to varsity.
I’ve known I was attracted to guys since high school but never really ‘entertained’ the idea because
- The community I was raised in is very homophobic. In fact, I don’t know anyone who is openly homosexual there.
- I hated that I was homosexual. I did not understand why me of all people needed to be gay.
- I’m really just ‘another guy’, so all of my friends are straight and I think homophobic (I would like to use this opportunity to say I have absolutely nothing against guys who are more in touch with their feminine sides, we are all different).
- Working hard to leave the villages and get into medical school kept me very busy (finishing my 5th year now).
It is only this year that I’ve accepted I am gay and I’m very comfortable with myself. I came out to my family a few weeks ago and they are surprisingly comfortable with who I am.
I’ve also just recently started dating guys (dating sites and apps mainly) but OMW! I am disgusted. Most gay guys seem to just be all about this ‘no strings attached’ hook ups.
I would like to believe we all have our preferences in terms of sexual attraction. I am unfortunately mostly attracted to the ‘straight acting’ guys. What’s more unfortunate is how most of these guys are so uncomfortable with being gay that you can’t:
- Comfortably walk in public with them because their friends might suspect they are gay.
- Discuss long term plans with them because, who knows, they might just conform and ‘go straight’.
- Get themselves to just fall in love with a guy and be comfortable with that.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m only 23 and still sorting out my career so I’m not looking to get married yet but yes, some day I definitely want to move in with a partner whom I’m in love with, get married and have kids. Are there any guys out there who are comfortable to just fall in love with another guy and be comfortable with that?
Am I looking in the wrong places?
Please leave a comment to let us know if you think there are guys out there that are comfortable with falling in love with another guy? Also, have a look at how to deal with homophobia.