Christmas is a great time for family and friends to gather and share in the joy of gifts, food and fruitcakes. But perhaps Aunty Angus’s fruitcake should not be the only fruitcake being talked about this Christmas. This is a tongue-in-cheek article that may help you with some ideas on how to come out as gay this Christmas.
1. Make an announcement about being gay at the Christmas dinner table
Once the aunties, uncles, and grandparents have their champagne, wine and lunch served, take that moment to tap your cutlery against your glass, and say that you have an announcement. As you announce that you are coming out as gay, remember to watch everyone’s face to savour their expressions as their jaws drop. If your family is conservative, they may lose their Christmas appetite, leaving more food for you.
2. Bring a date along to Christmas
Everyone loves surprises, and what is more surprising than bringing an unexpected gay date (or your boyfriend) along to the family Christmas gathering. Make sure that you are clear that he is a date. Also, ask your date to dress up in the most stereotypical way possible – tight jeans, skinny pink shirt, etc.
3. Give t-shirts that say “I support my gay son” as gifts
Have a special t-shirt printed for your parents that says “I support my gay son”. Make sure the t-shirt is of good quality and style, and the correct size. Imagine the look on their faces when they open their special gift at the Christmas tree. Make sure they wear your t-shirt for the rest of the day – it would be rude of them not to!
4. Arrive on Christmas day wearing your latest MCQP outfit
Dress up a little more special this year. Why not reuse your MCQP (Mother City Queer Project) party outfit (or any other gay-themed party). Who doesn’t like a cute little sailor boy in little hot-pants? That is sure to make the family wonder.
5. Slip a note in someone’s Christmas cracker
Secretly slip a note into your grandmother’s Christmas cracker that says “I am gay”. Then when everyone is reading their lame Christmas jokes, your grandmother will be announce “I am gay”. She will probably misinterpret the note, thinking that gay is a synonym for ‘happy’. However, once everyone is excused, tell everyone: “ah, that note must belong to me!”
I’m sure you have some funny ways to come out during Christmas! Let me know by leaving a comment below.